Changing Christians

Question from Brian:
Hi, I’m a recent christian turned atheist. I’ve found multiple atheist friends at my school, and they’re closer than I’ve ever had before. But there’s only one problem: I love this girl, but she’s a hardcore christian. She refuses to even consider anything beyond her blind limitations. Do you have any ideas for me? I’d really appreciate it.

Answer:
Just as there are as many specific rationales for Christian belief as there are Christians, there are as many specific escape routes as there are ex-Christians. There’s nothing which works for everybody, and the process can take so long that you don’t know what really did it. I took 15 years.

So, help us out by providing the answer to this question: why, as specifically as possible, does your girlfriend believe in the first place? If you know this already, or if she’ll tell you when asked, great, otherwise try to figure it out. I don’t think you’ll get far without this information.

Get back to me in a comment and we’ll have a think about it.

– SmartLX

7 thoughts on “Changing Christians”

  1. Hi, it’s me again. She doesn’t really give me a reason, and if I even bring it up she just stops talking altogether. She doesn’t even bother considering any other possibilities. I’m thinking about ending it altogether. (the relationship, not my life).

  2. Yeah, I didn’t think that would lead you straight to suicide.

    The two of you are going to have to talk about it sometime. That doesn’t mean you’ll agree – my wife’s religious, I’m not, and we discuss little aspects of that all the time. But eventually something is going to need negotiations between you, for example Church attendance at Christmas (which, actually, I sometimes attend with the family). I hope she doesn’t think she can just steamroll you into practising, because that’s going to cause an argument.

    Does she ever go the other way and try to convert you? That’s actually another way to engage.

  3. Yeah, nevermind actually, we got into a massive fight and broke up. We got out of a movie theater, (Inception, by the way, awesome movie) and there was a few people coming out of a church on the street. They approached us with the standard vigor of reassured christians, and it started a debate. I left them speechless. This infuriated her, apparently.

  4. Well done in the debate, then, and I agree about Inception. Sorry the relationship didn’t work out in the end. At least she finally got to hear your side of things in a defensive context.

  5. I just wish I would’ve seen it sooner. But I’m gonna stop commenting on it, you don’t want to hear my breakup story. I will be hanging around the site, though. It’s one of my new favorites.

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